College is bad and adolescence is worse

So, I've just started my second week of torture at Grand Valley State University and am already seeing a white imprint of I must not tell lies on the back of my hand. As opposed to this view, most people see college as an important growth stage between high school and adulthood. Herein lies the rub: I am already an adult.

That statement is not just an immature rambling of a teenager wishing he were older: there is evidence that I and others see. To name a few: I connect with very few people my own age, I associate much more with people far older than I am, and I am set in who I am. This drives a very divisive wedge between me and my classmates with the most relevant example that I think and live for 100 years from now while a good 80% of them live for friday night. Many of my classmates are here because they are supposed to be, they are here to develop themselves as people and change their fundamentals which will lead, presumably, to their building a personality upon these changed principles.

If youre a friend of mine or a long time reader, you understand that I know who I am. The difficulty of this relatively simple advancement in maturity is far tougher for many people to empathize with than one would suppose. As those my age in my life change, our relationship -and I as a person- become(s) somewhat of a relic of a past life to them.

I dont write this as an angst-filled projection of my feelings, but a real analysis of what I, and others like me, go through in a culture dominated by central ideas. This process is not unique in history whatsoever, but its frequent occurance in the textbooks doesnt make it right nor tolerable. Like single mothers, I and others must face or deflect hard, teary realities our peers are simply exempt from.

Now, let me go on record saying that I choose to face and not deflect them. Confronting ones problems and not dismissing them from thought is a key step in maturity, one I have passed yet others seem to linger behind. Whatever happens, I know that I am actuated in this human struggle by a higher Being and I pray He grant guidance to me and to all of you that survived reading this post :)